Two Things, Errr...Actually, Three

I painted my nails hot pink, and it's making me so happy!

New obsession? The show HOARDERS on A&E. Intriguing. Disturbing. So horrible you have to watch.

That's all.

Except that I was having a dream this morning in which I was really mad at Sean (I can't remember why), and when his alarm went off, I woke up and punched him really hard!!!

Harry Potter memories

In case you somehow missed it, Sean and I are completely obsessing over Harry Potter right now. After visiting the Wizarding World of Harry Potter, we couldn't help ourselves. I'm listening to the whole series on audio book and immersing myself in literary criticism of Harry, and Sean is rereading the series.

All this has got me thinking of some of my favorite Harry Potter related memories. Here are two of my favorites:

I read Harry Potter for the first time during the summer of 2008, which I spent in Florida. That summer Cathryn was also learning how to drive. Since I'm six years older than her, I was legally able to take her out driving. So one day, Cayla, Cathryn, and I were coming home from somewhere--with Cathryn driving--and we happened to be talking about J.K. Rowling. I was telling them how beautiful the author was, but the girls were in disbelief. They were both saying how they imagined her looking like the crazy cashier lady at our neighborhood Walgreens who is older, stout, with frizzy gray hair that always has an absurd hat (usually decorated with a big spider) perched on top of it. We were laughing so hard over this image as we pulled into our driveway that Cathryn lost track of what she was doing, and drove the van right into the house. Literally, she hit the house. I know I should've felt bad as the responsible adult who was supposed to be monitoring her, but it was one of the funniest moments of my life.

Another great Harry Potter memory is a lot simpler, but nonetheless meaningful. The day after our wedding, Sean and I were relaxing in our room at the Tiburon lodge, recovering from the craziness of the weekend. And we had one of the best evenings in the world: we rented Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire from the lobby's movie collection and ordered room service for a cheeseburger and a double serving of garlic fries. It was so simple and yet, was undoubtedly one of the best spent evenings of my life. And that's one of the reasons I love being married to Sean--I always have my best buddy around to enjoy all the little things of life with.

Greatness:

There's nothing quite like a great day. There are different things that make each day great, and today was great because:

I slept in until noon. (For those of you who think this is overwhelmingly slothful of me, let me add that I do wake up at 5:30 a.m. regularly for work.)

Sean and I went hiking up in the hills behind our neighborhood. We loved the views, the sunshine and green hills, and the little cottontail bunny who hopped across our path!

I babysat the Moothart boys this afternoon. I wished Thomas a Happy Birthday, received a spontaneous hug from Jonathan, and rescued Josiah when we all went inside and he remained outside calling, "Need help! Neeeeeed help!" (He couldn't get down from his perch.)

Chicken Parmesan for dinner. Organic, free range chicken from Whole Foods. Whole wheat pasta from Trader Joe's. Yummy AND healthy!

Now, yesterday was great for entirely different reasons. Vinny and I got to spend the afternoon together, just the two of us, since Giuliana was at a playdate and Michael was still at school. Vinny just discovered "fortune tellers" or "cootie catchers" or whatever you want to call them (the folded paper creations with four points that move back and forth...) and he was delighted beyond belief that I was able to make them. So, while he did his homework, I made fortune tellers for all the kids at his table in school (SIX). Vinny said, "I really like you now." I said, "EXCUSE ME?!?!?! You JUST NOW started liking me?" (I've worked there for 7 months.) "Well, I already liked you," he explains, "but I like you even more now!" Oh, the honesty.

Vinny also gave a brilliant and adorable explanation of where babies come from last night. Somehow it came out that I want to have at least 5 children.

Vinny: 5 kids??? But the more kids you have the more work you have!
Me: I don't think of it that way, I think the more kids you have the more fun you have!
Giuwels: I want three kids. 2 girls and a boy.
Vinny: I want three kids too. 2 boys and a girl.
Giuwels: Carolyn, do you have any kids?
Me: Not yet, Giuwelsy, I just want to have them some day.
Giuwels: Well, are you married yet?
Me: Yeah, I'm married, I just don't have any kids yet.
Giuwels: Well, if you're married, why don't you have some babies?
Vinny: (with authority) Giuliana, you don't get married and then a baby pops out. It takes a lot of time for love to fill you up, and then a baby comes out.

I think about my job a lot, always trying to figure out exactly what it is that makes me love my work so much. Here's one reason: I love my job because it doesn't feel like a job at all, it just feels like being part of a family. All the other jobs I've ever had felt abnormal--I would step out of my regular life and go do some task that I would otherwise never be doing--and then I would get off and re-enter the real world. In between punching in and punching out, I would count the hours--watching the clock and waiting for this interruption to end so that I could get back to what I really wanted to be doing.

When you're doing what you love--what you would want to be doing whether anyone paid you or not--well then, you don't have to watch the clock. Confucius said to choose a job that you love, and then you will never have to work a day in your life. There's this amazing feeling when you find a job that pays you to actually do what you want to be doing. So, I'm doing what I love--therefore, my job doesn't feel like a job at all. But there's another reason my job doesn't feel like a job: my job is, essentially, to be an active, supportive, and loving member of a family. This doesn't feel like a job to me--just a normal part of life. I spent the first eighteen and a half years of my life being part of a vibrant, struggling, chaotic, and loving family unit. This comes naturally.

When I moved away to college, I was still part of my family, but in a more removed way. I was a member, but from a distance. And the minute I moved, I started missing my family, and realizing just how much I had taken for granted. There's an inevitable loneliness that comes when you learn to live alone, or with a couple roommates....after you've lived in a house with six people whose actions, thoughts, emotions, and histories were shared in such close quarters. I love Sean, and we are incredibly happy together--we are completely happy in each others company, but to me--so often--our house feels empty. I especially feel this after I come home from a long day at work--where I slip right into the family dynamic and thrive in that environment. Sean and I have a family dynamic--it is just the family dynamic of two--which is far different from the family dynamic of 5 or 6 people, that I am used to. It's good for it to be just me and Sean right now. But I also can't WAIT until the day when our home is overflowing with children, and buzzing with life and activity. I also continue to love my job and enjoy all the moments I get to spend with these three kids--who have become family to me, and I to them simply by the sheer amount of time we spend together and the affection we share.

I love mornings when I take Vinny outside to wait for his mom to get back from driving carpool for her oldest child, so she can pick Vinny up and take him to school. Giuwels always tags along in her pajamas and we open the garage door and find the street half in shadow, half bursting with early morning sunlight. Vinny digs out a basketball from somewhere in the garage and starts shooting hoops, and Giuwels put her little hand in mine and says, "Come on, Carolyn, let's go sit in the sun." And we walk over to the large rocks that line their neighbor's yard, and she plays on the rocks and I sit on one, enjoying the warmth of the sunlight contrasting with the chill morning air. And everything is bright, and new, and the children are beautiful and precious, and this--to me--is happiness.

WARDROBE MALFUNCTION!

Tonight after work I picked my husband up from Biola's graduation ceremony and I was HORRIFIED to discover that Sean wore his Dharma Initiative LOST T-shirt, his ratty old GYM SHORTS that he wears everywhere, gray socks and FLIP-FLOPS! I expressed my utter mortification over his fashion faux pas and what does he say in an attempt to comfort me? "But I didn't put the socks on until AFTER I sat down."

Oh, that makes me feel SO much better!

So I say, "Sean, you couldn't manage to put on a pair of jeans for your friend's graduation ceremony?" "Care, these are my favorite pants!" "Yeah, and my hot pink pajama pants are my favorite pants, but you don't see me wearing them to class, church, formal events, etc." He replies, "But my shorts aren't PJ's, and I already destroyed one pair of shorts for you!"

And this is true. A few months after we started dating, I broke the news to Sean that his somewhat tight-fitting denim shorts with (I am not kidding you) GOLD STITCHED PLEATS UP AND DOWN THE LEGS AND AROUND THE CROTCH were the worst shorts that ever existed in the entire world. Sean didn't believe me at first, but after I managed to convince him that he should really never wear those shorts in public again, he ripped them into rags and then tossed them from the window of his third floor dorm room.

Good riddance.

And whenever I remember those pleated jean shorts, I start to think that the grungy old gym shorts aren't THAT bad.

P.S. I just read Sean this blog, and he's now laying on our bed reflecting over those ill-fated denim shorts..."I thought those shorts were cool...but then they got a little small."

GO GIANTS!!!!!!!

I have never seen Sean so excited as he is now about the Giants playing in the World Series! This afternoon, while I was taking a nap, he dyed his beard black in order to look like the Giants' closing pitcher Brian Wilson.

My husband:

Yesterday marked the hottest day in L.A.'s recorded history: 113 degrees!

In Whittier, it was 111 degrees, but Sean was thankfully ensconced in Biola's air conditioned library and didn't melt or anything like that.

Lucky for me, I was in Manhattan Beach working for the day, and although it was in the mid 90's there, we still had the benefit of a lovely ocean breeze, which made the high temperatures more bearable.

I worked late last night, and didn't leave the Costa's house until 9:45. Sean called me when I was almost home and asked me if I wanted him to meet me outside, so I said sure, but when I pulled up, he was nowhere to be seen. I was a little annoyed--thinking to myself, "Well, you shouldn't have offered if you were just going to forget..." Then all of the sudden, a man wearing only a t-shirt and boxers and carrying a cup of water steps out from the shadows of our neighbor's yard and says, "Would you care for something cool to drink?" Thankfully, that man was my husband or I would've been enormously frightened. At the same time, I'm not sure how thankful I am that my husband is prancing around in his underwear in our neighbor's yard in the dark of night. Hmmm. Well, one thing is certain: Life with Sean is never boring! (And for that I am thankful!)

3 things:

A lot has happened since I last wrote, too much to write about in just one post. So for now, I will just catch you up on a few major things:

1. I love being married.

Last October, just after we had gotten engaged, Chris Oliver asked me what I was looking forward to the most about being married to Sean, and I promptly responded, "It will be an adventure! There is never a dull moment with Sean," (or something to that effect...) To illustrate this point, I will briefly describe one scenario: Last Thursday night, Sean and I had a few friends over (Lauren, Greg, Jason, Dan, Adria) and we cooked a big spaghetti dinner on a tiny little hot plate (our stove wasn't hooked up yet) and ate outside in the cool evening air, but this story isn't about the dinner really, but about the dishes produced by that dinner. Immediately after our meal, we went to the movies to see Incepcion, and, since I had work the next day, I asked Sean to do the dishes while I was gone. Well, that didn't happen, but it was understandable because on Friday we got our internet installed, our stove hooked up, and our new bed frame set up. So when I had to work Saturday night, I asked Sean to just do the dishes then. I returned home right around 1:00 in the morning, and found my new husband wearing only a bathing suit and a pair of rubber gloves, washing dishes IN THE SHOWER. When I confronted him about the oddity of this situation, the truth came out: Sean hates doing dishes. I said that I wish he would've told me this earlier, because I LIKE doing dishes and was only asking him to do them since I wasn't around. Sean said, "I could do the dishes if I had a sink with two sides, a garbage disposal, and a hose." We do not have any of those things, and so I'm now the official dish-washer in our family, which is fine with me. On Sunday, I washed the three and a half days old dirty dishes (in the sink, not the shower), while Sean did a chore that I happen to hate: grocery shopping. Divvying up chores like this is wonderful! And all is well that ends well...My shower ended up streaked with grease and tomato sauce and the drain clogged with bits of salad and avocado, but even that cleaned up pretty well with a little 409.

2. I love my job.

For me to be able to say I love a job that wakes me up at 5:40 a.m. three mornings a week is a big deal, but it is the truth. I'm sure I'll be writing a lot about my job in the days to come, so for now I'll just describe another scene--in an attempt to show why I love my job so much. On Wednesday I picked up Giuliana from her Little Click Club (where she's learning to use a computer) and we walked over to the park to eat the picnic lunch I packed for us. It was a crisp, sunny California day...the kind of beautiful day that makes everyone want to live in California forever, because sun and wind and sky and ocean combine together in a glorious perfection. Well, I sat on the ground with Giuwels in my lap, peeling Clementines, and the two of us sharing the juicy orange pieces one by one. The warm sun was shining down on us in perfect contrast to the cool air, and I was filled with a deep contentment. Giuwels said, with her head leaning against my chest, "I like you." I said, "I like you too." And she added, "I love when we do this...let's do this every day!"

3. I love my new house.

Perhaps house isn't the most appropriate term for what is in fact a tiny studio apartment, but it stands alone behind our landlady's house, and because we live in a guest house rather than an apartment complex, I insist on calling this our house. Tonight is a good night to write about our new home, because I am completely at peace with it. For the past three weeks we've had boxes everywhere, and today I woke up and said, "No more. I will not go to sleep with boxes in my house tonight." While Sean helped Jason move, I unpacked the last few boxes and put the finishing touches on everything...Now I am sitting here feeling satisfied beyond belief. We somehow managed to fit in everything we wanted: our king size bed, 4 bookshelves, a table, four chairs, a desk, a love seat, and a stove! We live in a tiny room nestled under a great avocado tree. Our sliding glass doors open onto a small balcony and an orange tree. We wake up in the night to avocados falling on our roof, we reach for each others' hand and go back to sleep. Our Harry Potter books are sitting on our desk between two wooden lion bookends that were carved in Africa. During the day, Timmy and Garfield preside over our bed. Our house is overflowing with books. We have way more books than we have square feet to live in, and that's the way we like it. Our portrait done by the street artist in Waikiki is hanging on the wall, as well as prints by Rembrandt, Van Gogh, and Monet. The picture of Jesus that has hung over my bed since I was a toddler is also hanging on our wall, as well as Sean's crucifix from his first Communion. It is our home, and we love it, and I want everyone to come visit even though there's nowhere for them to stay! We'll make room!

BUSINESS!!!!

It has been absolutely the craziest week ever.

Last Saturday, Sean and I both graduated from Biola University!

Then we went to Roscoe's to celebrate!

Then we stayed up until at least 3:00 a.m. moving Sean out of his apartment.

Then we went to church and stayed for the potluck lunch, where they had a big chocolate cake to celebrate us and Father David gave us a blessing for our upcoming marriage.

We spent Monday hiking in Pasadena's Eaton Canyon, and had one of the best days ever...trails, running stream, amazing waterfall, warm sunshine, great conversation...

Monday evening we came back to La Mirada, and made a delicious spaghetti dinner with Jason, and enjoyed drinking red wine and playing Boggle.

On Tuesday Sean went with me to a job interview in Manhattan Beach, which went quite well!

Then we babysat Claire and Nicholas for the afternoon, and had fun taking them to the park.

Next we drove down to Irvine, and Sean hung out at a Starbucks while I babysat for the Kims for the last time.

Wednesday was filled with more babysitting...including my last time babysitting for the Lee's.

On Thursday morning, I got in a very, very, very minor, but no less upsetting, car accident, which made me late to my last day of work with Claire and Nicholas.

I picked up my wedding dress on Thursday!

Sean and I bought a super awesome bed for an even more amazing price!

And I stayed with the 3 Moothart boys overnight while Emily and Gabe went away to celebrate their anniversary.

Friday was spent with the Moothart boys. Sean and I bought them Happy Meals and took them to La Mirada Park where we fed the ducks and played Lava Monster.

Friday night we ordered pizza with Sean's friends, and drank homemade beer (which tasted terrible, therefore I consumed almost none of it) and talked about how awesome Harry Potter is until late in the night.

Today (Saturday) I had a second job interview in Manhattan Beach, which I am waiting to hear back about. We looked at a potential apartment and furniture...put our engagement photos up online...and tried to take a deep breath before another crazy week begins tomorrow.

I can't wait for a rest. On June 27th.

This Is Hell.

It's the Sunday after graduation, and I feel trapped in a weird time zone, waiting for the newest chapter in my life to begin, while the previous chapter has already ended. I dislike these strange in between times.

After the ceremony, Sean and I went with Dad and Amanda to Roscoe's to celebrate. We like to celebrate at Roscoe's. It's where we went after my Torrey Graduation, and immediately after we got engaged--where we sat in the weird, rosy lighting and looked at my ring in disbelief and had the waitress take pictures of us. Anyway, we went there yesterday and filled ourselves up with chicken, waffles, red beans, and rice. We walked around the much too bright streets of Hollywood reading the names inscribed in the stars on the sidewalk. My conclusion is as always: Hollywood is overrated and I would never want to live there in a million years.

In some ways, last night marked the beginning of Sean and I taking up our responsibilities as an independent couple. We were solely responsible for getting Sean moved out of his apartment, and while I can't say that it was the greatest idea to wait until about 10:00 p.m. to start moving, I probably would have done the same thing. Moving is such an unbelievably awful process that it must be avoided for as long as possible, no matter what the consequences. Still, it was us. No parents and no friends to help. I kept bemoaning the fact that his dad and sister hadn't stayed around to help us. Sean kept saying, "This is hell," and I added, "This is what Jesus died to save us from." (We were not very happy.) And yet, while the experience was sheer and total misery (3:00 in the morning, loading up our car with boxes), it was unifying, and enjoyable in the fact that we were working together as a team. I like solidifying experiences like that--that cement the fact that it's us against the world, and we've got to stick together. I'm sure many people will be sad that they missed the sight of us driving through the dark streets of La Mirada with a 6 foot tall book shelf hanging out of the car, and the one of the back doors wide open with me desperately trying to hold onto everything and keep it inside. And then we crashed into the bushes.

This morning at Church they had a cake for us, and Father David blessed us on our upcoming marriage!

This is a big week: moving, job interviews, finishing up the jobs I've worked this past year (which means saying good-bye to many dear, sweet children) wrapping up some of the final wedding details. But before any of that we are going hiking. For the past few months, the sole desire of my body, soul, and spirit has been to go hiking. Tomorrow is Memorial Day. We are taking the day off and going hiking in Pasadena, and I cannot wait!!!!

A Letter from the Past

A couple of weeks ago Sean got a letter in the mail...from his 12 year old self. His 7th grade history teacher had all of his students write letters to themselves, which he promised to mail to them in 10 years.

This is Sean's:
Dear Sean Thomas,

This is a letter from the past. Remember in 2000 about Mrs. Gonzalez, that Jason Yim, Chris Morales, and Todd Marquese all hate Jason Harding. You have read Two and One of the Harry Potter Collection, You are on three and waiting for four which came out in July or July, 8, 2000. You watch WWF Raw Is War on Mondays and WWF SmackDown is on Thursdays. 10 years from now I should be WWF Superstar that has faced the 37 year old Rock, if still there. Have a wife and expect a kid soon. I've never smoke or done drugs. Be healthy and have never broken an arm or a leg. Have a good education. Only share this with girlfriend or wife. Have never broken the law

Sincerely,
Sean Thomas